Know the warning signs of sexual grooming and stop childhood sexual abuse before it happens.
If you or your child is a victim of grooming, you may consider filing a sexual abuse lawsuit with an experienced attorney. Disparti Law Group is leading the charge in holding abusers accountable across Illinois, especially in Chicago schools. For a FREE consultation with an attorney, call (312) 600-6000.
In this Article:
- What Does Grooming Mean?
- Warning Signs of Sexual Grooming
- Signs of Grooming Behaviors in Adults
- Stages of Grooming
- Impact of Grooming
- Sexual Grooming in Schools
- What to Do if You Suspect Sexual Abuse or Grooming In Schools
- How to File a Child Sexual Abuse Lawsuit?
- Sexual Abuse Hotline — Call Now!
What Does Grooming Mean?
Grooming is a tactic that offenders use to build a relationship with a potential victim in preparation for abuse. Groomers are often in a position of power over the child. They slowly and methodically gain the trust of both the child and their families until they can convince their victim to perform sexual acts.
Grooming can occur in several different environments, including:
- in public spaces
- in organisations
- online
Warning Signs of Sexual Grooming
The warning signs of sexual grooming can look different depending on the age of the victim. Here are some signs of grooming that adults can look out for in both children and teenagers.
Signs of Grooming in Children
- Changes in behavior, such as mood changes
- Decline in school work or frequent acting out
- New toys or possessions
- A rehearsed response about an adult
- Sexualized play with toys
- Talks of a new game or “special time” with an adult
Signs of Grooming in Teenagers
- Describes the teacher or school employee as a sympathetic listener (i.e. “They’re the only one who understands me…”)
- Spending more time alone in their room
- Underage drinking/drug use
- Being upset, withdrawn, or distressed
- Suicide ideation or signs of self-harm
- Withdrawn from friends and family
Signs of Grooming Behaviors in Abusers
Grooming behaviors in abusers are not always obvious or easy to identify. It’s not uncommon for young people to have a close relationship with other adults in their lives, such as teachers or coaches. But when lines are crossed, certain grooming behaviors become clear as a red flag.
Offenders who groom may be overly interested in the child, finding ways to get access to them such as though social media, texting, and instant messaging.
- Special attention/preference to your child
- Offers to help the family (i.e. taking child to sports and other activities, babysitting, offering to do things around the house, offers you money or employment)
- Inappropriate texts and emails between your child and their teacher
- Gift-giving or unexplained gifts such as jewelry, clothes, toys, or electronics.
- Excessive touching or hugging
- Manufactures ways to spend time alone with child
Stages of Grooming
Sexual grooming often follows a predictable pattern leading to child sexual abuse. The stages of grooming are:
1) Victim selection
Offenders may observe the child undetected for a while before inserting themselves into the child’s life, looking for opportunities to exploit their target.
2) Gain access and trust
A child will trust another adult if they see that their parents also trust them. This is why groomers aim to not only build trust with the child but also with their caregiver. This is to disarm the victim when they finally make a sexual advance.
3) Fulfill a need
Groomers will look for some way to fulfill a need. That could be the need for attention, money, companionship, better grades, or even popularity. Offenders who engage in these behaviors are often close enough to the student to identify what this need is.
4) Isolate the child
Groomers will try to isolate the child from their family and friends. By this point, the relationship has likely gone beyond what is appropriate between a teacher and a student, even if no sexual abuse has occurred.
5) Initiate inappropriate or sexual contact
When the child is at their most vulnerable, groomers will begin initiating inappropriate or sexual contact. This may start with something seemingly small but continue to escalate to more extreme requests.
6) Maintain control
By this point, groomers have complete control over the relationship and they will do everything in their power to maintain that control. They may begin making threats that something bad will happen if anyone finds out about their inappropriate relationship.
Impact of Grooming
Sexual grooming, whether it escalated to full-blown sexual abuse or not, can have lasting effects on a child. They may begin to develop trust issues with other adults and even their peers. The impact of grooming can include:
- Self-harm and suicidal thoughts
- Anxiety and depression
- Post-traumatic stress
- Drug or alcohol problems
- Eating disorders
- Pregnancy
- Sexually-transmitted diseases
- Other mental health problems
A common warning sign of sexual grooming is that victims of grooming experience feelings of shame and guilt, blaming themselves for what happened to them.
Sexual Grooming in Schools
Schools present the perfect environment for offenders to find and gain access to their new target. Students often form close relationships with adults at school, so grooming behaviors can easily go undetected. Adults should be on the lookout for the warning signs of grooming to help protect students before the abuse occurs and weed out sexual offenders.
Teachers, administrators, and any other school staff are considered mandatory reporters, which means that if they see or suspect any form of abuse, they must report it. Failure to do so could mean the school was negligent and may result in a school sexual abuse lawsuit against the school district.
What to Do if You Suspect Sexual Abuse or Grooming In Schools
If you suspect that your child may be the target of sexual exploitation and grooming, immediately restrict access to the suspected offender and report your suspicions to your child’s school. Illinois schools must take immediate action when any claims of sexual abuse are made.
If you feel that the school or school district did not take the proper steps to protect your child, you may have the option to file a lawsuit against the school district for negligence and against the abuser.
How to File a Child Sexual Abuse Lawsuit?
Illinois has recently passed several bills meant to expand the rights of survivors of child sexual abuse by removing legal barriers when filing a sexual abuse lawsuit.
Attorney Larry Disparti and the Disparti Law Group Accident & Injury Lawyers have led the charge in getting justice for childhood sexual abuse victims in Illinois. When a CPS elementary school gym teacher groomed and abused three boys during and after school hours, we knew it was time to take a stand.
In this landmark $2 million settlement, we sent a clear message: abusers will be held accountable and we will fight to the bitter end to get justice for survivors of child sexual abuse. And we intend to stay in this fight for every Illinois citizen who has ever been sexually abused as a child.
Sexual Abuse Hotline — Call Now!
Victims and parents of abused children can speak directly and confidentially with an attorney who specializes in abuse cases by calling our Sexual Abuse Hotline at (312) 506-1235 today. You don’t have to go it alone; we are prepared to fight with you and for you.
